The Official Panda Entry: The Most Beautiful Shame

do u remember when ur dreads were this skimp? lls bet u miss ya hair now... lls uh huh..throwback like shit right? sheesh! we dont even look like this anymore!



so..

where do i begin and how do i begin?

i honestly dont know but it's kinda like at the end of casablanca where he's about 2 get on the plane but he looks back and says "here's lookn at you kid"

i dunno where ya came from but there are days when i wish ya black ass would go back! but then again there are more days where im just glad ur here. since i was 17 u've been a friend/enemy/lover/companion/shrink/competitor/asshole/comic relief/supporter/hater/devil's advocate/sparring partner and the list can go on and on. but at the end of the day i guess i can simply call u panda and to me that sums it all up. do u remember going to see jarhead? do u remember stalking me at children's place? do u remember hanover? do u remember the first time i met Ray? do u remember the locked room upstairs? i do and its like they were freaking yesterday, hell we still go 2 hanover lls. it's crazy too cuz musically no one is fucking with US...usually i say me but it's like you're on my level and trust me u dont find that to often. our convos are legendary and our beefs epic, but what i value most is our silence. like we can honestly say nothing and be freakin' content.
how awkward/weird/beautiful we are? i remember the first question u ever asked me and it wasnt even no cute shit, lls, simply "u listen to acdc?" and how blown/happy/content/pissed/hurt/sad/loved/excited/confused have we been ever since...lls

this next line is just for you and i kno you'll fully appreciate it, even though this whole thing is for you...well u get what i'm sayin shit.

through all the bullshit
though all the good times
bad times
goofy moments
and thrown cell phones
through all the complaints
and nap times
through all the NIGGAZ/MALES/DISTRACTIONS/The Lindsey Event(lol)/Before College
through all the drunken/high/sober moments
through all the lies/truths/misunderstandings/arguments/beefs
through all the cuts/tattoos/piercings/blade scars
through Bowie State/University Towers/Children's Place/Limited Too
through corny jokes/comedy specials
through Germantown/Bowie/Wheaton/Silver Spring/Baltimore
through facebook/myspace/twitter/blogspot
through Virgin Music Fest/Sonar/Hanover
through rock/rap/gogo/banana pancakes

there has been u



"how was i suppose 2 know
that you could get inside me
how could i have ever predicted
that you and me would make soo much sense
from the start
you know who you are
a piece of my heart would be missing
if you let my kissing
stop
it would be the most beautiful shame
if our beauty didnt stay
the same"

--Cody Chesnutt



*This is still funny as fuck to me*






*for the record* anytime u come at me about feeling any sort of way i will direct ya blk ass to this blog...lls